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bits from my life, some good, some bad, some funny, some sad. All true in every sense.
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To write or not to write
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Posted:Feb 26, 2006 10:04 pm
Last Updated:Sep 21, 2006 2:32 pm
727 Views
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I find that though I had a great weekend I feel marred by the sad news that my cousin's baby died yesterday during delivery. I weep and wish impotently that I could take hold of the world and change that horrid fate giving back that which is now gone. I mourn and weep shaking in impotent rage at the injustice of it all. I harbor no illusions that I can make a differnece and the fact that they are 2000 miles from me just makes me sadder in the wake of this tradgdy.
Much do I make of this sorrowful event and pray that life leads onwards.
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The end is just the begining...
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Posted:Jan 28, 2006 11:00 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
713 Views
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When in the dark you feel the grip of the end of a phase of your life. The cold hard tightening around your heart, the shallow never life giving breaths of air, racing pulse against your ribs. Life at these times seems bleak and dark like it wants to forsake you but alas it should not be for you should engulf that deep urge and overcome to rise again a phoenix from the ashes of your old life to live again in a new one.
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What is Love?
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Posted:Oct 31, 2005 6:28 pm
Last Updated:Dec 8, 2006 8:29 pm
824 Views
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Is love a physiological or hormonal endorphins used by your body to attempt to help you procreate? Is it more?
When one "feels" love what does that mean to us, is it a good thing? Does it make us a better person? With this in mind who does one fall out of love if one knows not what love is in the first place?
Though I pose these questions I have my answer, and thus is it as it should be though each must come to their own answer in their own way.
I find that love for myself is the willingness to do for the other person anything to make them happy regardless of the pain it causes you, sometimes this leads to a closeness and an emotional commitment, others it drives that person away due to the "intensity" of your commitment to them.
"All things are fair in love and war." to this I surmise that war is much more vicious than previously thought because I have seen the bitter infighting that happens in what passes for love amongst the people I know, the conniving and backstabbing as each person maneuvers for the optimal position with the optimal partner, lying about what, who and where they are in life.
These lessons we learned in our early childhood about who is important and who is not, we carry into our younger years and on into pre-adulthood, whilst the clicks circle round and round each trying to oust the other and reign supreme in the school. Fend for thyself least they devour you and destroy that which is you.
Love is that which sets us apart from the animals yet we find maternal love and spousal love in primates, wales, dolphins, birds, even now in lizards and some smaller mammals. So if love is more universal than thought what sets us apart? Is that the war which we considered earlier? For no other animal kills in such a way as we, nor do they take without compunction as do we. Love it should be not war but it seem that war is ours no other creature on earth wants it, and many want love, nay need love.
I love in such a way that I would lay down my life for those I love and have been n danger of that in the past and will do so again should the situation arise. My life for theirs, that they might be fulfilled it seems a small choice. Send the troops home and let them die no more.
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round and round the merry go round...
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Posted:Oct 25, 2005 8:51 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
766 Views
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So things seem in life to go in nice even stretches followed by cataclysmic events. the rhyme and reason is not always ether a rhyme or a reason and in fact seems to often be a lead up to something worse. As I wonder what the next round of disasters in my life are, I put on the glad face and hide behind the socially acceptable masks, mouthing the polite phrases, when inside I cry and die... is this the reality what is the world that makes this, why do we as humans put each other through these levels of torture?
music: Teasrs for Fears -The Hurting - Memories Fade
movie: Donnie Darko
art: Eye by M.C. Escher
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Strip Clubs....
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Posted:Oct 9, 2005 9:02 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
818 Views
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I was invited to a Bachelor Party this weekend and as part of the festivities we ended up at Honey's Strip Club... My have things changed. The gals are a bit more aggressive and the stage work is very very different from what I knew 15 years ago.
Back in the day the girls seemed to have a slightly more polished act but that might be my remembrance, and it seems that the new uniform is 3" high platform high heels it looked very '70 disco.
Quite odd...
I must say I enjoyed the show and the dances I received. Some things have not changed <grins evilly>
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Prose in poetry
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Posted:Oct 2, 2005 9:30 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
786 Views
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I see her every day she rides the same bus as I though not every day and not always do is see her. Slim, youthfull and gracefull I watch her on those days I see her the sure movements the kind smiles to those she knows, often I wonder if I would get one of those smiles if she too knew me. She gets on at my stop and gets off at the same stop as I. I watch longing and wondering what it is I see in her, and if she would ever notice me, just another guy on the bus, a familiar face but no one she knows.
I moved... and see her no more, does she wonder where I went or who I was, probably not as I am gone, and never really part of her life.
My wife is gone....
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