Metaphors of a Second-Hand Lion: A New Series
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Posted:Jul 11, 2013 6:58 pm
Last Updated:Aug 18, 2013 5:46 pm
25071 Views
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Since the last post seemed to go over pretty well, I thought I'd try another approach... a metaphoric one. I'm starting a new series I'm calling Metaphors of a Second-hand Lion. Like the title? It's just thoughts I've had in the past rearing their heads to see if anyone is interested. Yes, these are writings from my past, albeit fairly recent past... maybe two to three years at the most. That's as much as I could save when my hard drive and backup hard drive crashed in the same day and wiped out 25 years of writing... that was a very sad day for me.
Anyway, here's installment number one. Enjoy. 
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Metaphor the First: Men Trying To Find Ms. Right.
Trying to find Ms. Right when men hit their forties is much like fishing in the ocean. The fisherman has his fishing gear, his hook, his bait (dare I call it a worm?), and his fishing boat.
He dresses appropriately for the surroundings he is fishing in, and if he does not dress correctly, he risks getting cold or wind-burned and might even drown in a turbulent, competitive sea. He needs to bait his hook with the right bait, because certain bait attracts certain fish. That bait must be attractive to the fish he wants, as the Ms. Right fish is very particular. If he puts the wrong bait out, he is going to catch a fish that is not a keeper, such as the Ms. Wrong fish, and he will end up throwing her back.
The Ms. Wrong fish is usually not very pleased about that situation, either.
His hook had better be strong, made from the steel of determination, drive, and dedication to landing that fish; and most of all, the hook must be a labor of love, since no factory-made hook will land the Ms. Right fish.
Once he hooks a fish, he has to land it, and Ms. Right is a very big, hard-fighting fish. The fisherman has to pull steadily, let up on the line often, give this fish time to work out its situation, and finesse the entire operation.
It is not always a fight; in fact, most of the time it can be pretty easy to reel her in. But bear in mind that the Ms. Right fish has been known to slip off the hook during those easy times if the fisherman is not careful. Landing that fish can take a very long time, and the fisherman must be prepared for the long haul.
Once he has landed the fish, he had better hope his fishing boat is capable of supporting it, as the Ms. Right fish will require a certain amount of openness, flexibility, and comfort, since the Ms. Right fish is not intended for eating, but to swim right alongside the fisherman.
We will avoid the obvious "fish" jokes that spring to mind here. I wonder if it's possible to find a mermaid?
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You've Heard of Plato? Aristotle? Socrates? .... Morons.
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Posted:Jul 10, 2013 12:11 am
Last Updated:Aug 25, 2013 6:41 am
26239 Views
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Yes, I made a Princess Bride reference. I love that movie.
I've just read over this post before I published it, and it sounds like I'm attacking people on this blog or other blogs. I'm not. Truly, I'm not. I don't play bullshit games like that. So if you're reading this and thinking, "Hey, Lion is saying this about ME!!!"... stop thinking that. I'm not. I don't know you well enough to direct anything at anyone on here, except maybe M1ssy, and it's not directed at her, either. So that being said, I feel like waxing philosophical tonight.
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Socrates is widely known down throughout the ages as one of the wisest people who ever lived. His published works are brilliant, and he is still one of the most quoted philosophers in history, though most people don't realize the quotes they're making are from him. He is one of the founders of Western philosophy... think about that for a minute. If you ever feel like getting a little wiser, you'd do worse than reading up on the works and philosophies of Socrates, all of which were written down by his student Plato, and Plato's student Aristotle.
And one of the most poignant things Socrates ever said was also considered one of his most enigmatic. I've come to appreciate this quote over the last couple of years, and I think I may even have come to understand it to some extent... maybe. The quote is this:
"The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing."
Socrates. From Plato's Apology.
You could go crazy with this quote, and I'm far from the right person to try and explain all of the nuances that this quote could potentially encompass. Lord knows, I'm a smart guy, but there are times I can be just plain stupid. But here's a bit of what I've come to understand about it.
Stop thinking you know everything, open your mind to accept possibilities, and quit trying to be a know-it-all.
I used to be like that. Sometimes I have to catch myself from STILL doing shit like that. I think it's the curse of humanity to believe we know everything once we hit our teenage years, and we only get over that belief after a long, long, LONG time, a lot of hardships, and living a lot of life... if, in fact, you get over it at all. Some never do.
It's amazing how many people in the world truly think that they have the answer to everything right in their pocket. You see it constantly online, since people are shockingly brave with their opinions when there are no consequences to giving them out. You see it with the people you work with who have been doing their jobs for a while and think they've got it all down pat. You see it with advice about relationships and love and heartache, how to raise your or your pets, how to care for your aging parents, how you should decorate your home, blah blah blah. Everyone has opinions.
There's nothing wrong with opinions. In fact, I'm of the opinion that everyone should chime in with their opinions... when someone asks for them. The problem lies in when your opinion is not asked for, or if you choose to shove your opinion in another person's face and try to force them to accept your opinion whether you agree or not. Not to badmouth religion, but religions worldwide are amazingly bad about this. This coming from a good Christian boy.
I think one of the meanings of Socrates' quote is the inherent danger of thinking you know what's best for everything and everyone. And worse... ignoring another person's advice or opinion simply because it doesn't fall into your "acceptable" range of thinking.
I mean, I've only ever lived my own life. I've never lived your life. How can I possibly know what's best for you on a given topic? But what I HAVE done is lived my OWN life, and I can give you MY OWN perspective on how I'VE dealt with that given topic. Then once you've heard my life experience or my "wisdom" on the matter, you can do with that information what you will.
If I were to try and convince you to do as I suggest, or try and force you down a particular choice, or even pressure you to do what I tell you... most likely, you'll tell me to my face that you'll do it, and once I'm gone, you'll do whatever you wanted to do, anyway. So why waste the effort, the time, and the frustration? You'll either do what I suggest, or you won't, and you'll live with the results of your decision, and my hands are clean.
What's more, there are about 6 billion people on this planet, and people live and die every day... each has had an entirely different life, filled with different perspectives, different experiences, different knowledge. Among those people are brilliant minds that specialize in a gigantic array of topics. Who am I to be so egotistical as to think I know better than they do about a given subject? I certainly don't know every single viewpoint of humanity. Maybe I'd be smart to listen with an attentive ear to every opinion and every fact people give to me...
... and not reject those thoughts outright because they didn't sound right at first blush for whatever reason.
Does that mean I'm going to necessarily AGREE with all those opinions and such? Of course not. Some people are freakin' nuts. But to outright ignore what a person is saying about a topic simply because I don't agree with it is absolutely the dumbest thing I could do. For all I know, that person might know a hell of a lot more about it than I do. For all I know, that person is right, and I'm wrong. How would I know unless I gave their viewpoints full consideration? A genuine attempt to reconcile what they are saying with what I think/know/believe.
I might still reject it. But at least I gave that person's perspective a chance. I attempted to learn from it, even if I disagreed with it, because you never know how much of what they're saying is actually true.
Because, after all, I know nothing. How else can I truly become wise but to accept that I don't really know anything?
Maybe it would be easier to rephrase the quote a little: I KNOW nothing. But perhaps I have a great deal of knowledge about things I have learned and experiences I have lived. If I actually knew something, no one could ever teach me anything about that thing. So if I agree that I know nothing, I can continue to be taught. I won't reject ideas out of hand because they conflict with what I KNOW... I'll give the ideas due consideration and see if those ideas are worthy of being added to what I believe to be correct.
And let's face it: I might be pretty damn good at head-knowledge and book-learning and military thinking and on and on and on, but not a damn thing of any of that has prevented me from being in the circumstances I find myself in. If I'm so damn smart, how did I end up in such a stupid life situation?
And so, I must accept that I know nothing, so I can try to keep learning enough to better myself.
Combine that with Albert Einstein's quote:
"The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result."
Or something to that extent... I'm paraphrasing a bit. But the point is clear: if what your doing isn't working, why the hell are you doing it again? If where you are isn't satisfying, why aren't you trying to move?
If everyone in your life is telling you over and over that what you're thinking or doing is wrong, there are only two options: either everyone in your life is wrong, or you are. What's more likely? That dozens or hundreds or thousands or millions of people are completely and utterly wrong... or that you're wrong? Let's just think about that a minute, shall we? Which is really the most likely?
Someone reading this just thought to themselves, "I'm right, naturally. Everyone else is wrong."
Well, I guess you KNOW everything, don't you? Socrates would shake his head in dismay.
Well, so much for thoughts about sex and relationships, huh? I kind of thought this blog would start taking a different direction... geez, am I really going to start writing essays? I know my writing skills need exercise, but come on, Lion... are you really going to bore your readers? You only have 10 watchers as it is, for crying out loud.
Who knows? I just felt like being philosophical tonight.
"To Strive, To Seek, To Find... And Not To Yield."
Lord Alfred Tennyson.
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Lonely Lions Aren't Much Fun.
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Posted:Jul 8, 2013 10:35 pm
Last Updated:Aug 12, 2013 1:14 pm
19006 Views
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I had a blog post all written out, and then I went and deleted the damn thing by accident... unrecoverable, I tried. It's just the perfect end to a really bad day.
This heat is burning me out. I'm off my diet and lifestyle changes almost completely. I haven't been to the gym in over a week. I haven't had any luck on the dating scene, and no luck here either. Work is okay, but it's beating me up, and it barely makes ends meet. My damn insomnia is acting up again, and the melatonin is only moderately helping... I may need to start taking Valerian root pills, and if I have to do that it means the insomnia is getting really bad. I'm in a slump, and I hate being in slumps.
I'm seeing signs of depression again. That's not good. Depression is how I gained all my old weight and lost the only decent job I ever had. I act like a damn fool when I get depressed, and that's the last thing I need to do. I can't let this spiral out of control again. I need some inspiration. I need help.
Blogland, I know you don't really know me except for what I write here, but maybe you might have some suggestions for stopping this downward spiral. I need to be inspired again. I need to believe in something, or focus towards something... hell, I need to get laid, or fall in love, or something!
Any ideas?
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So What Do You Consider "Big", Anyway?
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Posted:Jul 5, 2013 10:36 pm
Last Updated:Aug 28, 2016 7:30 pm
19430 Views
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Hello, Blogland.
I know I don't have many readers, but I also know most of those readers are female. I like that. What heterosexual guy doesn't love a lot of female attention? So I'd like a general consensus on something here, and I need the female perspective on it. I suppose the gay-male perspective might also be helpful, since the topic DOES include you.
I've been reading through tons of female profiles lately, in my ongoing search for a regular FWB, and I've been coming across something that is common, but a little vague. Some of the women on here are looking for what they refer to as "Big Dicks." Now, I'm not asking what that means... I have one, I know what they are. But my question is this: since in these cases, size matters... what size are you looking for, exactly?
I ask this because I've chatted with a few women on here before, and at some point in the conversation, penis size always comes up. Okay, it might have been me initiating the conversation sometimes (hey, when one of your better qualities is a decently-sized cock, you tend to want to make it known), but many times it's the woman who asks me about it. And I've gotten a lot of answers to the question, "What do you consider big?"
I once had a very sexy conversation with one lovely lady on here about that very thing. She told me she liked, in her words, REALLY big cocks! Well, I may be large, but I don't think I'd qualify as REALLY big, so I told her as much. She asked me how big I was, and I told her. Her reply was in all caps and with plenty of exclamation points: "Wow! That sounds pretty damn big to me!"
On the other end of that spectrum, I chatted with another woman who also said she loved really big cocks, and when she asked me about mine and I told her, her response was: "Oh, is that all? You're not quite what I'm looking for," and shut down the chat.
In actual sexual encounters, I've had many women tell me I'm the biggest they've ever had, and only one tell me I was small compared to her regular lovers. Most tell me I'm pretty darn big. Being a guy, I love this response.
Now this brings me around to the crux of my topic. Many women on here say they're looking for huge cock, but they don't define what that means. If, to some women, I'm the biggest cock they've ever seen, then I qualify... to other women, I'm Tiny Tim and I don't qualify. So how can we guys, who are attempting to woo you ladies, know if we are what you're looking for, or if we're just wasting our time and yours?
So... the question on the table is: what do you consider to be the range when it comes to Big Dicks? If you could create the Periodic Table of Cock Size, where would you draw the line at Big? I know different women have different tastes, but that's why I'd like to hear from everyone.
When does a cock go from "Average" to "Large", in your opinion? Please feel free to be specific. I think this would help bridge a few gaps in communication here, or at least one gap, anyway.
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Sitting in a Coffee House, Admiring the View
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Posted:Jul 1, 2013 5:00 pm
Last Updated:Aug 18, 2013 5:42 pm
24974 Views
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Since my Internet is still down at the house, I'm back at Starbucks again, playing games and checking email, and of course, writing in this blog. It's my day off, I have some extra cash in my pocket, and I'm antsy to go do something either today or tomorrow... and I have no idea what.
Actually, what I really want to do is go do something WITH someone. I'm feeling lonely again, and my friends are, as usual, too damn far away. It sucks when your friends live over an hour and a half away. I've never really made any friends here in Manteca... frankly, most of the people I've met here just aren't my kind of folks. Not that there's something wrong with them, just... I don't know, people who don't share my interests. Or if they do, they're weird, creepy people.
I'm beginning to wonder if my interests are weird and creepy, and I'm the exception to the rule... OR AM I????
Anyway...
I'm come to realize that I'm not just looking for a lady for sexual companionship, I'm also looking for a friend. I miss the old days where I had a good group of pals to hang around with whenever the mood struck us. There was always something to do, because between all of us, we could come up with SOMETHING, even if it was just hanging around and shooting the shit.
Here's my difficulty: what I like to do tends to be pretty solitary in nature.
I enjoy games and gaming. This doesn't necessarily mean solo, but other gamer-types also tend to be solitary. So the obvious solution is to hang around where gamers hang out, and make friends, right? Well, I tried that. Most gamers are... well, lame. I hate to say that about my fellow gamers, but it's true. Most of them are lacking in social skills, tend to brag a lot about their gaming accomplishments, and love to hear themselves talk. Plus, gamers pretty much do nothing BUT game, and frankly I need more than that in my life. I like going out and DOING things. I like to explore.
I wonder if there's an explorer's club still in existence, and if it happens to be local? I guess I could look into something like that, see if there's a group of people who like to go and see and do. I think that would have to be somewhat specific, though... Hmmm....
I like sex. Well, okay, let's be honest... I LOVE sex. Frankly, if I could join a group of friends who were pretty free and easy with boinking each other, I'd be pretty okay with that. The problem with THAT is... that's a very male-heavy occupation. I swear, I should have been born female, I would have been every man's dream. But male I be, and male I LIKE being, so let's not dwell on that. I've looked into swinger clubs and sex groups, but this is where I hit a wall. Every single one of those groups require men to pay to get in and participate, and while I might be a working man again, I'm not so flush that I want to drop between $50 and $100 every time I want to socialize. And once again, I hit that problem I have of being bad in groups of people I don't know... I never know what to say or how to fit in until I'm already doing it. I have no problem just leaping in, but... well, let's just say I've never had much luck with that.
What else do I like? Water parks, theme parks, museums, karaoke. I could go do karaoke on a regular basis again, that's cheap. I like singing, and it tends to be a way to introduce myself to people. Maybe I'll do that. Water and theme parks are only really fun with other people, and I need to make friends to accomplish THAT particular goal. Same with museums, although there are times I'll go by myself... I can take my time that way.
I might start looking into local area groups to see what is out there. I think I'm long overdue to make a concerted effort to make friends in my own town. I've always hesitated to do that since I never really saw myself staying in Manteca... I've never liked this area much. Hell, I'm still looking into career opportunities elsewhere because I just don't want to stay here. Maybe one of the reasons I don't want to stay is my lack of friendship here. Certainly a possibility.
I'm not sure why I'm posting all of this. Maybe I just need to get it all down in print to sort out my feelings on it. I don't know. I'm feeling a little maudlin today.
And so... I'm sitting in a coffee shop, writing in my blog, feeling a little blue. Dorie was a little blue. Actually, she's a lot blue. She's a natural blue. Oh dear God, I'm referencing Finding Nemo. I really need a friend.
Still looking for that special ladyfriend, too. Don't think I'm not. Message me if you think I'm worth a look, dear ladies of Blogland.
You know, I speak Whale.
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A Touch Is Worth A Thousand Words
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Posted:Jun 28, 2013 6:10 pm
Last Updated:Aug 18, 2013 5:41 pm
25590 Views
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Before I get started, just wanted to say I'll be missing this weekend... my Internet got hosed, and I won't have it fixed until Monday. Thank God for Starbucks and free WiFi.
Back to my post.
I did something spontaneous today, and probably a little too risky, but it turned out okay.
A little background... there's this hot little redhead (who I will nickname Red for this post) at my workplace that sadly has a boyfriend already, or I would have asked her out the first day I met her. Cute cute cute CUTE! Now, as long-time readers know, I'm an insatiable flirt. I have to seriously rein myself in at work to avoid sexual harassment suits, simply because it's just natural for me to flirt with everyone. Not that it's particularly successful for me, but I can't help it... I love to flirt. It makes me feel good, and usually makes the lady feel good about herself.
Well, early this morning, before we all broke up to head to our separate cleaning areas, I overheard one of the housekeepers there comment on this redhead's eyes and how beautiful they were, and how jealous she was that Red had both gorgeous hair and eyes. As Red was passing me, I heard her say something along the lines of "Really? I never thought so."
I didn't even think about it, really. I just reacted.
As she passed me, I said, "Well, let me see." and I gently cupped her face with my hands and gazed tenderly into her eyes. They were, in fact, absolutely gorgeous light brown eyes. I held her face for moment, and said, "I'm with her, you have beautiful eyes."
Now, guys have been fired for less than that. With sexual harassment suits being thrown around for even glancing at a woman in any manner other than professionally, what I did could easily have been a one-way ticket to the Unemployment Line. It was not professional conduct, it was very intimate, and on retrospect I really wish I hadn't done it. It was a needless risk to a job I very badly need to keep, and it's not like I had a chance with her anyway since she was in a serious relationship.
But you should have seen the look on her face.
At first, it was mild surprise. We were acquaintances and on a friendly basis, so it's not like a stranger or some guy she didn't like was doing this, but for me to just do something like that surprised her. Then the surprise turned into wonder, a little awe, and a completely returned tenderness. I smiled, she smiled back, I let her go, we had a laugh over it, and everyone else laughed in surprise as well. It was a totally spontaneous reaction on everyone's part. I even repeated the act later to my supervisor when people were talking about it later,(because she asked what I'd done, and I was showing her) and she reacted similarly, if a bit more professionally.
Now, will I be doing this ever again? No. That was really risky behavior, and this might not be my dream job, but damn it I NEED this job. It was a stupid thing to do in this paranoid, sue-happy, screw everyone else but me, entitlement-minded America we've come to create. I won't risk my job like that again.
But...
It was so... awesome. For a moment, two people touched intimately and parted on a good note. It was friendly and personal, we were in each other's space, and damn it, it felt GOOD to do it! I looked into her eyes, and we bonded for a brief moment. I left a lasting impression on her, as was evident by the fact that she was STILL giggling and talking happily about it when the shift was over to everyone that would listen. She realized it was a positive experience that happened between us. I'm almost positive that, if she and her boyfriend break up, she will most likely let me know about it and make herself available for dating to me, should I present the offer (which I would, in a second).
And I have to wonder: how have we, as a nation, come to the point where we don't connect like that anymore unless we become a couple? Why is everyone so terrified of each other that we can't touch each other without flinching away and apologizing? We've become so frightened (and justifiably so) of being sued and losing everything we own and being put in jail for the smallest misconception or the tiniest slight, real or imagined. What happened between Red and I was magic, and real, and incredible, and it lasted for maybe two seconds, and will stay with me for a very long time. And I'm afraid that I'll lose my job over that small but powerful experience.
I can see why actors fall in love with their counterparts in their respective shows... how could anyone be so close and touch so often without it impacting their lives profoundly? But even touching has become sterile in so many ways, especially work-related (then again, that's probably best anyway).
I cupped her face and looked tenderly in her eyes. And she responded positively. Almost like a woman in love.
Was that so bad?
I ask the Peanut Gallery, oh BlogLand Dwellers. Was that so bad? How would you respond to a friend or co-worker, or maybe even a stranger, doing to you what I did to her? Would you have the courage, or maybe foolhardy stupidity, to do what I did to someone else?
Makes me think of John Lennon for some reason. Not sure why.
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The Lion and Mrs. Robinson... Coo coo ca-choo!
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Posted:Jun 26, 2013 8:58 pm
Last Updated:Aug 12, 2013 1:20 pm
18837 Views
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I had a bit of a pleasant surprise today.
I've been talking with a lovely lady here on our favorite website. As usual, I'll be keeping names out of it since I respect privacy... if she wants to come forward, I'll leave it to her to decide. No, her name is not Mrs. Robinson... it's a Beatles song, I'm being silly. 
After some friendly chatting and texting, we agreed to meet today. Well, technically we agreed to meet a couple of days ago, but life happens and we had to reschedule, but semantics... we finally met today.
I wish I had sound effects to put on here, because I'd put in a wolf whistle right about now!
If I've learned anything about online dating and other online meetings, it's that most of the time the pictures on the profile almost always make the person look better than he/she is normally. This is simply because they usually take the time to make themselves look the best they can for the picture so they look good. We all do that, including myself, and there's nothing wrong with that.
So it's completely normal if the pictures people post look better than what we look like in real life. It's not because they're different people (although there are far too many people who do that), it's just because they're dressed to the nines with makeup and perfect hair in the pics, and look normal in reality. Hell, I'm guilty of that... I'm in a thousand-dollar suit in my profile pic, for pete's sake!
So it's with this in mind that I say the following: for the first time in my personal experience, the woman I met in real life today looked WAAAAAYYYYY better than her pics made her look on her profile!
Stunning woman, truly. Her pics did NOT do her justice. And very personable, too! As per usual when I end up talking with a beautiful woman I've never met before, I kind of stumbled a little and felt kind of awkward, but she just rolled with it and no harm was done. It's nice talking to someone who doesn't mind opening-remark-jitters.
We had a terrific talk, chatted about our and what we thought about this and that. It was almost like talking with my long-time friends, it was that kind of relaxed talking. Since it was just a meet-and-greet, we kept it light and cheery, no sex talk except a couple of questions about kissing. As you may have guessed, I checked out her hair (among other things... like I said, stunning!), and she has very nice hair. I look forward to running my hands through it.
All in all, probably the best meet-and-greet I've had in a long time. I think we clicked very well, and I'm looking forward to meeting her again. Actually, I'm looking forward to getting some private time with her and exploring her body, thoroughly. But you know... first things first.   
Keep your fingers crossed, oh Bloggers of Blogland...
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Damn it... now I have that song stuck in my head...
Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio? A nation turns its lonely eyes to you... woo woo woo...
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Why the Lion?
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Posted:Jun 24, 2013 10:39 pm
Last Updated:Aug 28, 2016 7:39 pm
24891 Views
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I get asked that question all the time... why am I called The Lion? It's a valid question. A lot of women on here and elsewhere on the Internet think it's some sort of sexual reference, but really that's just coincidental.
I mean, yes I AM a sexual lion, but... you know... that's not why that's my nickname.
I've always identified with the lion. Lions are family-orientated, they work together and live together. Lions are beautiful creatures who possess a noble grace and sleek power. There's a reason their groups are known as "prides"... they have every reason to be proud. They're the king of the jungle, after all.
Back before I got heavy, that was me. Fast, graceful, powerful, family was everything, leadership qualities, and a team player. I didn't realize my own greatness until it was gone, since I had a bad self-esteem, but later in life I learned a lot about myself. When I was young, I was pretty damn impressive, and it all went to waste because of bad self-esteem.
I loved lions then because that's how I wanted to be. I didn't realize I already WAS like a lion, and most everyone realized it except me. It wasn't until I grew up and got my self-esteem back that I saw what I had been. I see myself much more clearly now.
And I still identify with the lion with my new self-image. I still have strong family values, and now I know what it is to fight fiercely for them. I may not be sleek and graceful anymore, but my power is in my mind rather than in my body, and even my body ain't so bad anymore thanks to getting back to the gym. I'm more of a leader now than a follower, but I still play as a team despite my independent streak. But then, lions also have an independent streak in some regards.
I have a lot of lion-stuff, although I actually don't collect them. I just get lions as presents or t-shirts or something, and I love them. I'll have to do an HNW pic someday with my lion comforter.
Over the years, with my friends knowing that I like lions so much, plus the fact that all of my online aliases usually have "lion" somewhere in the name... it's combined to give me the nickname "Lion." Not many of my friends call me that anymore, but online that's who I am. It's a good enough screen name, and it suits me.
As for why I chose "lionthatroared" as my name on here, that goes back to a book called The Mouse That Roared. If you ever get the chance to read it, it's a funny book, and it's a minor classic. It's basically the story of a tiny country called The Grand Duchy of Fenwick that created world peace by pure accident. It's also about how power can be used for good if you just try. I liked the idea. So I'm The Lion That Roared.
I'd be happy to answer other questions if anyone would like to post some.
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Ahhh... Summer! Water-slides, Anyone?
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Posted:Jun 22, 2013 9:25 pm
Last Updated:Aug 12, 2013 1:22 pm
18643 Views
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It's getting on into June here in California, which means the weather is hotter, the outfits are skimpier, and the siren call of the water sings to us all. Since I'm already doing lap swimming, plus I have a pool on hand here at Casa De Parents, the water doesn't quite call to me so loudly as it does most. Still... I've been getting the urge to do one of my favorite activities: WATER PARKS!!!
I don't know what genius came up with the idea of making an entire playground devoted to water, but I wish I could shake his/her hand. Delightful pools, wild waterslides, crazy water funnels, dead drop falls into water, water cannons, water-based fortresses where shoot water cannons at each other, tubing, multi-tubing, water skiing, wave surfing, wave pools... how do you go wrong?
Not to mention beautiful (and not so beautiful) bodies in various levels of undress, picnic parties, barbecues, iced drinks, slushies, volleyball, and all the terrific things that make up a standard group party at a water park. Not to mention the underlying sexual tension, since everyone is completely surrounded by three of the more powerful sensual attractors for the human race: water, action, and naked bodies. It's a happy day for all.
The thing is... it's also a bit of a meat market. You wouldn't think so, but water parks are amazing places to meet members of the opposite sex (or same sex, if that's your game) IF you have a fantastic body. If you have an average body, or maybe don't look the best in swimwear, you get overlooked... even shunned.
I think it's because we are also very vulnerable at water parks. We're semi-nude, barefoot most of the time, and completely surrounded by other semi-nude, barefoot people. On the surface, we're all there for watery fun and frolicking, but there's also that very palpable undercurrent of sexual tension there, and we're all on display. Naturally, the "ideal mate" DNA kicks in and gets us all in an uproar, and we tend to focus on the hottest people there, regardless if they are out of our league or completely in our league. On the other side of the coin, those who ARE the hottest people there become subject to the scrutiny of many, many people, and they may not like it coming from anyone other than the "ideal mate" they envision.
Meanwhile, we average folks are feeling all that sexual tension, but we can see for ourselves that we're completely outclassed by those super-model wannabees (male and female). This can either make us feel like crap, or we can choose to reject the entire dynamic and focus on watery fun... and walk around with raging boners from all the bikini-babes.
Let me tell you, male bathing trunks do very little to hide a hard-on. Especially wet ones. Much like women's nipples when coming out of that cold water. And we're back to the sexual tension again.
Fellow Blogger Sloggers and Bloggomaniacs out there in BlogLand, I humbly suggest that we have a meet at a water park this summer. California would be nice. I'm thinking as close to my location as possible, although... have trunks, will travel.
And of course, after the fun at the water park, there's also later that night... But Ahhh, Oh Those Summer Nights!
Yes, I made a Grease reference. Oh well, oh well, oh well, oh well, oh UHHH!
What do you think? I'll bring the chips!
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Getting Back On The Dating Scene
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Posted:Jun 20, 2013 9:02 pm
Last Updated:Aug 12, 2013 1:24 pm
18738 Views
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I've been taking something of a hiatus from dating for a while. Frankly, I just wasn't meeting quality women. For some reason, I keep attracting women with low self-esteem, or little self-respect, or desperately clingy, or want to rush headlong into the relationship without giving it any time to actually grow into something real. I couldn't figure out what I was doing wrong, so I backed away from dating for a few months.
I don't know if things are better now, but I'm fairly convinced that I know where I was going wrong... I'm a very accepting man, I'm a nice guy, and I don't judge a person by the obvious. Of COURSE I'm going to attract women with all those issues, because they think I'm a safe bet! It was always me to ended the relationship. I hate being the bad guy, but what else could I do? Stay with a woman I don't respect? That doesn't work on either side.
I'm taking more positive steps now. I'm being picky about who I'm asking out... from here on out, I make better choices.
This, of course, doesn't apply here. That's dating... this is playtime. Naturally, once I get into a committed relationship, playtime is over. Unless she's into that sort of thing. Probably even then, unless there's a threesome opportunity involved... hey, I'm a guy!
Here's where it gets sticky: as I've mentioned in prior posts, I suck at dating. If the lady I'm with is just awesome, I'm a foolish mess! I try too hard, I go overboard... I just plain go into panic-mode, and I end up looking absolutely nothing like the man I actually am. And if the lady I'm with is just sorta okay, I get into the mindset of "Well, maybe SHE'S the one who's a foolish mess? Maybe I should give her another chance?" Once in a while,that pays off. Most of the time, it doesn't.
So, I suck at dating. Worse, I suck at meeting women in social settings. Oh, I'm friendly, and I can be outgoing and comfortable in groups as long as there's someone there that I know and like... if I'm alone in a room full of strangers, I'm a complete recluse. I have no idea how to start a conversation, and I'm sure you've all come to the conclusion long ago that I'm a bit geeky and nerdy.
And where the hell do singles meet nowadays, anyway? Where I am, the only singles that go out cluster into friend-cliques that are impenetrable fortresses of solitude... woe to ye who dare enter their sacred space! Not to mention, most of those friend-cliques usually have guys who cock-block any guy who might horn in on their imagined territory.
I'm not a bar-going fella very much. I'll go out and have a drink with someone, but that's not my preferred spot to be. Clubs suck... they're just meat-markets, and this aged beef is an acquired taste that most of those clubbers want nothing to do with. Besides, they're loud, half the club is usually drunk or stoned, and the other half friend-clique up. Often the same half.
I've thought about hanging out in my own favorite kinds of places might work. I like museums and zoos and theme parks... not exactly places people usually go to get a date, though. I like game stores, although those places almost never have women in them, and the women that ARE there are usually either bizarre whack-jobs, squirrelly mouses that squeak if you speak to them, or bored out of their minds because they're attempting to hang out with their geeky boyfriend/husband.
Actually, if I could find a genuine Gamer Girl to date, I would be a happy boy. Ladies, I know you think we Gamer Guys are just boys with toys, but honestly... if you join us, we will love you forever. Especially if you combine games with sex. My ex-fiance was a Gamer Girl, and it was truly awesome.
Anyway, I'm off the subject. Dating. Where should I go to meet women? Let's skip the typical bar/club routine and think seriously here. I'm especially curious what you ladies think... where do you go to have fun? Not necessarily to find a date, but places you enjoy being at where, should a guy come up and start a conversation with you, you'd be perfectly happy with that. That's why I was thinking museums and zoos and places where there are people standing around a lot. Lines in theme parks can start great conversations, but you have to get lucky enough to be in line with a single lady who wants to chat with a strange guy... and isn't buried under her friends or (the biggest difficulty with hitting on women in theme parks).
As usual, I want to hear your thoughts.
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Testimonials... Without Having Actually Hooked Up?
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Posted:Jun 18, 2013 7:07 pm
Last Updated:Aug 25, 2013 6:42 am
25364 Views
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Okay, explain something to me here: why the hell are some people writing testimonials about women with whom they've never even met?
Seriously, this has got to be one of the most monumentally stupid things I've seen on this website. I peruse the female profiles often, seeing to whom I might send a message, and I see testimonials that outright admit they've never actually seen this woman, yet they're talking her up like she's the best fuck since Jenna Jameson. I see shit like:
"Wow, this woman is the greatest thing since sliced bread! I can't wait to meet her! Return my message soon, baby, so we can get started!"
... or ...
"Man, this chick can suck a dick better than anyone ever! I wish I lived close enough to get with her!"
... or ...
"What a sexy babe! I would love to meet her! Her pics are so hot!"
...
...
...
..... seriously? How are these testimonials?
What is it that these guys think they're accomplishing here? Last I checked, testimonials are about giving your opinion on your personal experience with a particular individual. If you've never even met them, or for that matter they won't even return your message, exactly what experience are you giving a testimony of? Your jack-off session while looking at her pics or videos? A web-chat? Sexting? What the hell are they testifying to?
I suppose it's a way to get yourself noticed out of the packs of wild dogs barking madly at the woman's profile, hoping she picks you out of the throng. But honestly, if a woman were to give a testimonial about me, and I didn't know squat about her, I'd probably delete it. At the very least, I'd blog about it, point at the pathetic individual who can't seem to grasp the concept of Testimonial Vs. Email Message, and laugh derisively at them. Unless it's FlirtyOne61, because I secretly heart her and wish I could spend an hour just touching her hair... but I digress...
Then again, if a woman were to do that to my profile, I'd actually be really concerned about Crazy-Bitch-Syndrome. And if I'd be concerned about CBS on the male side, I can only imagine how the female side would look at CBS (Crazy-Bastard-Syndrome).
I would also think that, as the recipient of this unwarranted testimonial, I would delete it instead of keeping it... which brings up the question: why did the lady keep it up? Does she find it flattering? Is she hoping the testimonial will lend her credibility? I will admit that I'm very glad M1ssy gave me a testimonial of our time together, as it lends me credibility, but hers is a genuine experience (many, in fact, so she knows what she's talking about). What kind of credibility does a bogus testimonial give, especially one that obviously shows the guy has never met the woman before?
Am I missing something here? Does this actually WORK on you ladies... does it secretly flatter you or something? Or do you agree with me in thinking that this looks seriously desperate and is very tacky? As usual, your comments are welcome.
Or maybe I should say... TESTIFY, BROTHERS AND SISTERS!
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The Art of Flexibility, and a New Perspective.
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Posted:Jun 17, 2013 10:16 pm
Last Updated:Aug 12, 2013 1:27 pm
18586 Views
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Normally, when I talk about being flexible, I'm usually referring to mindset and attitude... i.e. I'm a flexible guy, in that I'm open-minded. But today, I'm referring to flexibility in the physical sense... i.e. a gymnast, yoga expert, or contortionist. For some reason lately, I seem to be drawn to the notion of having sex with a genuinely flexible woman.
Most of the women I've dated/gotten freaky with have generally been not the most flexible of ladies. I have a tendency to be drawn toward women with some meat on their bones and not skinny-minnies, and heavier people aren't usually very bendy or acrobatic. Even the women I've dated who have been lightweights were typical in the bendability of body parts.
I've just never been all that fussed about the ability to wrap yourself into a pretzel before. Most guys see a woman do some sort of contortion, and they'll whistle and hoot and nudge each other, saying things like, "Damn, she could wrap herself around me anytime!" But I always just thought it was impressive in the way of a professional performing her craft. I don't know... it just never DID IT for me.
But for the past week or so, I can't seem to get the idea out of my mind that I want to have sex with a genuinely flexible woman, like a gymnast or a yoga instructor. I think it's their form that's attracting me... that graceful posing, the apparent ease in which they can move their bodies, the complete control they have over their movements. Once upon a time, I just thought that was impressive... now, I just want to be the one they're wrapping themselves around.
I don't think my tastes have changed much. I still prefer women with some meat, although admittedly my preferred upper size limit has shrunk a bit in the past few years. I think that's because my own size shrunk, and I've come to truly appreciate healthy living, and I think women who are healthy as well are much more attractive than they used to be. And I still don't think skinny women are all that attractive... I mean, they look all... bony. Eat a sandwich, girl!
I guess that as much as I prefer to not be like the typical guy, I continue to be more and more like one as I get older. Are my tastes maturing, or am I just more picky than I once was? I know my tastes are changing, though... that's become very obvious to me.
My love of great hair is becoming much more pronounced and intense. While I was a work yesterday, a woman with the most incredible black hair came into the area I was working in, and I actually froze in mid-action just to watch her pass. One of the nurses nearby me said, "Geez, Lion, you could be a little less obvious about staring at her cleavage!"
It was at that moment that I saw that the raven-haired beauty was wearing a low-cut blouse. I HADN'T EVEN NOTICED!!! And this from a confirmed, dyed in the wool tit-man! Fortunately, nurses tend to think that sort of typical-male behavior is funny rather than offensive, and we all got a chuckle out of Lion's jaw-drop. But... wow... I was so entranced by this woman's raven hair that I didn't even notice the cleavage? Mind... blown.
Am I gaining a new perspective on women and sex? The brain boggles. I think I need to experiment with this. As usual, I'm taking volunteers.
Especially bendy ones with long, thick, gorgeous hair. Mmmmmmm......
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