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| Blogs > lionthatroared > Roaring from the Lion |
I'm Going To Die Getting Healthy Again. Irony Is A Bastard.
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I'm Going To Die Getting Healthy Again. Irony Is A Bastard. Okay, a little background. I mentioned earlier in my blog that I'm fighting high blood pressure. I also mentioned that I'm trying to lose weight and maintain a healthy lifestyle diet. I haven't mentioned that I'm a little lactose intolerant... not severely, but you don't really want to hang around if I've had too much dairy in my diet. I've also mentioned that I'm working out with lap swimming nowadays, which is doing good things for my health. I lost my goggles, so my eyes aren't feeling so great, but I just replaced them today, so that should be handled. My goggles, that is... not my eyes.  So... blood pressure, lose weight, lactose intolerant, working out. I think we're all caught up. I am going to starve to death. I'm sure you've all seen those sitcoms where older men with high blood pressure are warned about laying off the red meat and greasy food and such, and they inevitably cheat (ONCE! How is that realistic?), and suddenly they're keeling over and having heart attacks. So I'm sure those of you without medical degrees have a general idea of how I need to lower my blood pressure. Lay off the red meats and greasy foods, no alcohol, no salt, no butter or bacon or doughnuts or noodles, no french fries, no caffeine (although that's not proven by any studies, and some even say coffee can help, so that's inconclusive), sweets, or nuts. Sigh... okay... not really liking that, but okay. I can do that. What SHOULD I eat for high blood pressure? Fruits, veggies, skim milk, dark chocolate (wow, really? But... no sweets, right? Bad for the diet, anyway.) fish, chicken (both prepared in as tasteless a fashion as possible... and I really like fish, too...), whole grains, and foods high in potassium and magnesium. Okay, I can do that, too. I like fruits and veggies, I've gotten used to skim milk over the years, I love dark chocolate (my favorite chocolate, in fact), I typically get whole grain breads and such anyway, and I can add the other heart-healthy stuff to my diet. Okay... this is still doable. Need to lose weight, still. Hmmm... okay, well... I have to keep my protein up. My body type requires a high amount of protein, both my doctor, my dietitian, and my own body screams for it constantly. Besides, with the lap swimming, it would be a slow form of suicide to not maintain high protein levels. Just means I have to have a lot of fish and chicken in my diet. Not bad at all, I like both. So I need to keep counting calories, lay off the sugars and fats, keep working out with swimming and such, stay active, eat healthy... all that standard "never eat anything genuinely tasty again" kind of shit. Hmmm... lactose intolerant. Well, I'll have to go easy on the skim milk, even though I need it for my blood pressure. And the chocolate, too... three strikes, it's out! For that matter, there are a lot of veggies that practically make me a walking methane generator... NOT the best choice when I'm trying to find Ms. Right, I think. Maybe go REEEEEAL easy on that... All of that is doable. It's not fun, but you don't get better without sacrifice, right? No pain, no gain? It's not a diet, it's a lifestyle? Right? Right? Something happened today. Honestly, when it hit me, I had to fight tears. For me, that's saying something. I went shopping today, and for the first time, I was shopping not only with my diet in mind, but my blood pressure. I was having trouble finding foods that filled all of the requirements I had, and still be able to store it all in my little room and small section of the refrigerator. And I was suddenly struck by all of the foods I can't have anymore. Most of it is no loss, but... a lot of it is. I suddenly realized that I can't just sit and eat chips anymore. I can't have a bowl of ice cream without wearing a gas mask. I can't have dill pickles... that's my go-to diet snack, since it's zero calories, but I can't have them because they're packed with sodium. Probably the reason why my blood pressure is up again. I can't eat steak anymore. No bacon. No beef. No more wine and cheese. So much for wine and cheese tasting. No bacon cheeseburgers, and that's just hitting below the belt. It's a serious thing I have to do here. Heart problems run in my family, and I'm the first one to be able to recognize it and do something about it BEFORE it becomes a problem. I have to keep my weight down and my exercise up if I'm going to be serious about my military retirement... the military is looking for reasons to kick people out, and they damn sure don't want to pay out retirement anymore. Diabetes is a running problem with my family too. And aren't I just a lucky to be the first in my family to become lactose intolerant? Sigh. These are changes I have to do. I'm doing them. I recognize the necessity, I know the health benefits these changes make in my life, and they're doing good things for me. But... ... ... ... why did it have to happen to me? Why do I have to lose foods that I like? The exercise isn't so bad, and in fact I enjoy it, but the food... It's just not fair... For the fifteen years I dealt with the soul-crushing debt I was saddled with by my ex, the only thing I had that was a luxury was food. It's one of the reasons I became a foodie. I couldn't afford my own place, I couldn't afford a car, I couldn't afford new clothes, I couldn't have all the cool toys most people my age could have... but I could eat, and I could enjoy eating. And maybe I had to sacrifice some things to get healthy again, and sacrifice others to lose all the pounds, and maybe it was for the best. But today... looking at all those grocery shelves full of things I can't have anymore... I realized how much my life has changed. I can barely recognize myself in my old photos, and I'm nothing like who I was so many years ago. I've become such a better person over these years. So why do I have to lose the one thing that has always made me happy? Dangerous thinking, I know. Using food as comfort. I had to break myself out of that rut years ago in order to stop the downward spiral. The problem is that I just don't think I've found anything to replace it. And that scares me. It scares the ever-loving shit out of me. The only thing that gives me any comfort anymore is my cat, and she's dying of old age. And that scares the shit out of me, too. When I made the change to stop letting food take control of my life, I didn't realize just how drastic a change it was going to make on me. I think that's one of the reasons my sex drive, already pretty high, has been on hyper-overdrive the past few years. I've replaced one thing with another. And I think it's THAT realization that made me decide to stop trying to drown in sex and look for Ms. Right. And that is stymied. So what do I have? I think that scares me most of all. I don't really know. Oh Jesus, I'm a walking, talking cliche' for middle-aged men. I knew I was heading for mid-life crisis, but I think maybe I've been here for a while and didn't realize it. And to think... it was triggered by walking down a grocery aisle. I'm not sure how I got from describing a shopping trip to here, but here I am, nonetheless. I guess I'm having a weak moment. Hopefully you'll understand... I already have enough women thinking I'm tame and weak, the last thing I need to add to that is unmanly. But that's what a blog is for, right? To write out what you're thinking, so you can put it all in perspective? Maybe that's just me. It's all worth it. It is. Maybe if I keep telling myself that, I'll eventually believe it. .  Your Friendly Neighborhood King of the Jungle, The Lion. READ THIS! ------>>>lionthatroared I DARE you to read my blog and attempt to be unchanged by sheer, utter AWESOMENESS!!! It's like Kung-Fu Panda fighting Super Models with heavy metal music pumping in the background... hyped up on Rockstar energy drinks! And... whipped cream with chocolate sprinkles! And... laser-guided sex toys are probably involved! And... and... oh, I know... I'm pretty sure Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked it at some point! |
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The guy I've been seeing, HC, is Mr. Strict Diet. He is extremely rigid and has incredibly strong will power. I don't agree with all of what he follows, nor do I have the urge to be as strict as he is, but you might check out the Slow Carb Diet, or the 4 hour body, by Timothy Fenriss. It has worked amazingly well for him, and while I don't follow it as he would wish, I will say there are some valuable nuggets in there that I have adopted. But I'm also not a fan of completely depriving yourself, so I'd say still enjoy some of those foods in moderation, Lion.  2022... it HAS be better, right?!
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I'm not sure who gave you all that info, but there are things you can do that is a WHOLE LOT easier... And for starters.. Dill pickles are good for you in a few different ways. Do some more research, like where your nutritionist is on base. They will have the perfect plan for you and you won't starve . The occasional steak... Will do wonders for your psyche  Respond to every call that excites Your Spirit ~Rumi  ..
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I struggle with making permanent nutrition changes, as well. I can do it for a while, but always seem to end up backsliding. Maybe a change in perspective is what you need. You said you've become a foodie. I'm sure you realize that foods like bacon cheeseburgers and doughnuts aren't particularly gourmet foods So why not challenge yourself to make healthy foods delicious? There's no reason that chicken or fish have to be boring or flavorless.(I should be taking the above advice, myself. I acknowledge that a big challenge is time. It takes TIME to grocery shop and cook healthily)   
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