4735 posts 4/8/2006 12:55 am
Last Read:
4/23/2006 1:28 am
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Bloggerhouse Rules
clevergirl4U wrote a really interesting post called [post 292267] and asked some pretty searching questions. She really got me thinking again about this strangely compulsive pastime blogging.
I’ve been blogging on AdultFriendFinder for about eight months now. This is my hundred and twenty ninth post, which makes me a beginner compared to some, but might just about give me some claim to a little experience. Like so many other bloggers the reason why I am still here is different from the reason why I first came on this site, and were it not for the blog I’d probably have gone by now. We’ve all got long stories to tell and I don’t believe in posts that go on forever.
When I first came into blogging I was pretty much a novice to all online interactions, certainly ones outside of a professional capacity, and I also came to realise that there were some differences between blogging within a forum is actually very different from an “open blog” on your own website. So my experience has been very much within the framework of what I call “forum blogging”.
And bit by bit I set myself some rules to blog by. I don’t expect others to abide by them necessarily, just that they work for me more or less most of the time.
So here they are:
Content
Be true to yourself. Write what you want to write. Don’t write simply to impress, because sooner all later other bloggers will come to realise that’s what you’re doing and get tired of it. I enjoy that extra little creativity that comes out of blogging, which for me is a prime motivation - and why I like poetry. Others keep really good living diaries or social commentaries, stuff relating to the process and technicalities of blogging itself, or games or whatever. All are cool. All contribute to the magazine like quality of Blogland.
Keep a pocketbook or similar for ideas, wherever you go. Most might not make it, but you’re never short of ideas. It’s amazing what can trigger a post, and totally unpredictable.
I’m not going to preach about plagiarism. Jeez, I’d be on a one man crusade against the whole of the World Wide Web on that score and it would come across all pompous and stuff. But it really is dumb (and not very nice) to plagiarise your blogbro or blogsis. If you’re going to quote something they’ve written give them the credit, and it is a nice gesture to do it as a link.
Write at least one post a week or so. Just so people know you’re still around.
The Numbers Game
Something the highly respected rockwriter58 advised me very early on is not to get obsessed with numbers of readers. Different bloggers have different audiences for different reasons. It’s great for the ego being a blog-star, but most of us workaday bloggers, including myself, are not. Frankly I would rather have an audience of a handful that I knew and liked, and could respond to and get to know better, than a larger audience, most of whom would be anonymous. If I had more it would be nice I guess but it's not going to make a radical difference to my life or how I feel about myself.
Me, Myself and Thousands of Others
Forum blogging means that we are all part of a blogging community. Many of the people who visit your blog also write blogs as well and have similar aspirations to shout out their various messages and sing out their many songs into the electronic morass so fondly called Blogland or Blogville. Hey, they’ve gone to the trouble of what you’ve had to say, so find out what their blogs are all about. Particularly those who have gone to the trouble of commenting. Try to keep up with your “regulars” but it might be impossible to comment on everything they’ve written, particularly if they are prolific. Commenting on their most recent three posts strikes a happy medium. I spend something like 80% of my blogging time commenting on other people’s blogs. I almost always find them interesting and at times truly inspiring. Sometimes they trigger off a creative spark for a really good post, so it’s well worth it. The longer I blog the more emphasis I put on other people’s posts.
Keep a record of other bloggers you’ve visited and the date you last visited them. I use mind-mapping software, but doing it in another format is equally as valid. That then flags up those who you haven’t connected with for a long time. With the best will in the world it happens. It takes a long time to keep up with everyone and often time just runs out.
Always respond to comments. Friendships often arise and develop through comments and responses. Commenting is real fun and it gives you the opportunity to make a personal response. It can also take a post in all sorts of unexpected directions. Sometimes you might want to follow a comment through with an e-mail if you want to say something personal, or something that would simply be inappropriate in open forum.
It’s worth subscribing to have the ability to e-mail more easily. Silver or gold membership will give you just that extra flexibility and ability to communicate.
It pays to be proactive. I keep an eye on the list of who’s visited my blog. Is there anyone new? Are there blogging friends who keep on dropping in on me I haven’t visited? I also look down the newly created blogs, both for handle and content. It’s a kind of wildcard, but I know there are a lot of good blogs out there and finding a new blog that appeals adds to the whole thing.
Blog Behaviour
Remember that Blogland is more real than you might at first think. In my experience people behave very differently in letters, e-mails, phone calls and other forms of mediated communication than they would face to face. I call it the “doggy in the window” syndrome, where the is muh more fearsome than if the window wasn’t there (usually ‒ hehehe if you get it wrong! Don’t try this one at home folks!). It’s so easy to vent your spleen at another blogger with the technological assistance of a keyboard.
Press [Return]
Act in haste and regret at leisure!
Truth is, all but the most atavistic reptiles on this site (and there have been the odd one or two, I believe) have feelings and are open to getting hurt. So I work on the maxim that I won’t write anything I wouldn’t be prepared to say to someone in person. When it happens from time to time in Blogland it just seems very junior high, and we’re these attractive, sensual beings, aren’t we? Avoid bickering, it’s never an attractive quality. And hey ‒ there’s the rest of the universe to badmouth!
And every bit as important say nice things. Help your fellow blogger to have a nice day.
Bloggers in Arms
On a similar score think relationships. Cyber-relationships follow the same basic rules as the non-cyber ones we’ve spent our whole lives learning and still occasionally getting wrong. Be a bit sensitive about interaction, take things gently and don’t make other bloggers uncomfortable. Do take no for an answer and don’t make a nuisance of yourself. If things are meant to be they are meant to be, and will grow and develop ‒ if they’re not they won’t. That’s cool. Being realistic about things most cyber relationships will stay cyber. That’s cool too! Some might cross the boundary, like a dream coming true, but let them happen rather than force them into being so. It’s not for this post to discuss the different journeys we’ve all made and the differing expectations we all have about where being on AdultFriendFinder takes us, but go figure ‒ we’re not all the same in who we are, where we’re going and the agendas we all have. As I wrote earlier we’ve all got long stories to tell and I don’t believe in posts that go on forever.
Certainly not mine! And this is about long enough.
Let’s stay, as saddletrampsk says “one big happy dysfunctional family.”
And in the words of [blog mzhunyhole].....
Love y'all!
And may the Blogmuse be with you.....
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1386 posts 4/15/2006 10:36 am |
I'm glad your blog has flourished. Thanks for the nod of approval. I'm glad you shared these thoughts here. I'm sure they will be helpful to many others.
♪rockwriter58♪
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1386 posts 4/15/2006 10:35 am |
I'm glad your blog has flourished. Thanks for the nod of approval. I'm glad you shared these thoughts here. I'm sure they will be helpful to many others.
♪rockwriter58♪
warmandsexy52 replies on 4/15/2006 11:07 pm:
Rocky your early encouragement meant much. Thank you. You rock my friend. |
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4/9/2006 12:23 pm
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Warm
Excellent post.. and yes we are one big happy dyfunctional and truly sexy family..
warmandsexy52 replies on 4/12/2006 12:38 am:
awww thanks saddle darling - will you be my big happy dysfunctional and truly sexy babe?  |
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4/8/2006 1:50 pm
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Sort of a bloggers bible Warm........nice one....HB2xx
warmandsexy52 replies on 4/11/2006 4:33 am:
Thank you HB2. Now don't you go talking about me writing bibles and stuff. It might just all go my head and I'll be thinking I can create universes .... well maybe a bloggiverse or two. |
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4/8/2006 1:23 pm
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Hmmmmmmmm might be nice to add to my blog list! But no bending over for you sweety! That's your job to me *W*
warmandsexy52 replies on 4/11/2006 3:30 am:
Hmmmmm! Intriguing! Tell me more ........ |
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4/8/2006 10:35 am
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Great ideas, thanks for this. I have really enjoyed getting you know you, and countless others, this way. There is some brilliant stuff on this forum!
I would tend to disagree though that a blog relationship and feelings are as "real" as a blood-flesh relationship. Totally different. For me anyway. Anyone can write things. Some do it better than others (you are an example of that), but in the end it's real easy to hide, like the doggie-in-the-window analogy you offer. But that's me.
I agree wholeheartedly with what you say about being KIND. That's what it's all about.
Love & Light,
BF
warmandsexy52 replies on 4/11/2006 2:10 am:
Thanks BF. I always value your comments.
Strangely enough, I totally agree with what you say. There is a difference between a cyber relationship and a blood-flesh one. There is body language, expression, closeness, intimacy and a reality that adds to the words and I share your love of that "real" world. But I am aware that bloggers have bonded closely, found soulmates, built up a rapport that blood-flesh adds to, rather than acts as an alternative. I think what I'm suggesting is that there is an emotional element to a cyber relationship and that people can be emotionally affected by what is written, including being hurt, and I guess that's where I'm coming from.
And you're so right about being KIND. I truly believe the world holds up a mirror to ourselves. It is a neverending quest to see that the image is to our liking, and if not where we travel to next.
Wishing you pleasing reflections.
W&S |
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11240 posts 4/8/2006 9:58 am |
~ smilez ~ whilst reading....
warmandsexy52 replies on 4/11/2006 1:57 am:
How much I have learned from you, Goddess, and how thankful I am. I stumble a little less through blogville .....  |
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